Slacker or Striver !

If you are reading this sitting on a plush chair in an AC room and the time on ur watch is anywhere between 9AM-6PM , then you are part of the 50million odd people (yeah that figure was got from a survery) who slack away precious time in the corporate world. Today i got this funny forward "How to look busy" and boy i was laughin my head out( ahem! i had to hold back that chuckle lest ppl around me think im dangerously insane), and you guys are thinkin right, even i'm a humble comtributor to that 50million no.
Being busy at work and looking like it are two different sides of a coin, and some of the tricks of the trade to look busy are (cliches consumeth the me!) :

-->Never walk without a document in hand, those with nothing in their hands look like they going to the cafeteria.
-->Messy Desk,build huge piles of documents around your desk, only top management can get away with messy desk.
-->Look impatient and annoyed, this gives an impression that you are unde stress.
-->Send important mails at unearthly hours (i.e 2AM or 7:24AM) and public holidays.
-->Sigh ! and make sure there are lotta ppl sround you while you are doign that.
-->Apart from books put lotta thick computer manuals all around you.
-->Read a lot of computer magazies and memorise the all important jargons and use it in daily conversation.

Well apart from acting busy there is another thing in the corporate world i have to battle ,Team Meeting! Phew the sound of it makes my skin crawl. It might be useful to compare the corporate meetings of today to a Basketball game(im a great fan,Tony i loveth thee) , in which people participating are a "team" attempting to "play" a quarter in which each player "blocks" the "defenders" from scoring, which will result in everybody in the team exchanging "high-fives" and the leaders gettin a "pat-on-the-butt" which inturn results in the "managers of the team" walking happily to the bank. Hmmm, i think we can't really compare it to a basketball game but you can sure comapre it to a funeral gathering, where everybody are wearing uncomfortable clothing, with the i'd-rather-be-someplace-else look on their faces. The idea which ought to be buried is never really buried, they stagger up the coffins to slap us and eat our brains every other week.
Team meetings are held for the same reason Hanukkah is observed, for tradition and most of the meetings are held on a Monday cos , its a Monday no other special reasons! Most of my Team meetings invole a white book and a colorful pen(courtsey our company stationary) and i start the ordeal by writing down the date and underling it twice, rest of the twenty odd minutes is spent looking at the person talkin ,who most probably is your PM with enraptured interest like he is revealing the secrets of the great black universe , i also take the trouble of drawing doodles once in a while just to show that i do understand the secrets of the great black universe.
Things can get dicey if your PM looks at you and says "we need your INPUTS for blah blah blah", now this word INPUT should be enough to bolt you back to position. This is serious cos what he really means is, if i manage to fuck up then you are to be blamed. A sensible thing would be to escape by setting your dupatta on fire or picking up ur cell and declaring "bin-laden is at the other end". If none of it works you could start talking in Hebrew or Latin.

Slacking off, as i see it is not really difficult, what with all the team-meetings, coffee breaks, newspaprer breaks, "lets-go-fill-our-bottles" break and "i-just-need-a-break" break.
The next time you hear that "no, i'm busy" phrase you should be smart enough to understand that the scum is actually sitting and blogging!