Looking Forward 24

It all seems surreal now,like a sweet memory from a distant past,but the beauty of it all still nestles me. Face smothered with cake,roomful of people with eyes clearly showing a disrupted sleep, b'day jingles resonating with thunderous laughter, Oh boy growing old isn't so bad after all!

The monotonic tune started its hum late in the night, since im not really a nocturnal creature waking up at 12AM was a real chafe. B'day wishes followed by conversation i couldn't really comprehend kicked off what happened to be one super-dooper day. Phew! The tune that started as a hum went into full throttle by early morn , so much so i was dreading gettin my brains fried by all those strange radio waves.
Yummy Pancakes and FruitSalad for breakfast(courtesy::Sis) and a big fat cheque (coutesy::Dad) , i was expecting this cos my sis knows i like pancakes(extra-crispy) for breakfast and my dad was just upholding the tradition that he started a decade back,its true when they say men and shopping stand at two ends of the totempole!
The real suprise was shadowing me thru all this, something that left me numb,something that brought a tiny tear(moi not the sensitive types thats why tiny!) , something that ill treasure for a long time.

*puttin on the poet's cap*

they came on bikes with a cake to surprise,
and when they stepped into my house,oh boy i was stupefied!

endless mails must be ve gone back and forth,
i know this cos i ve done it too before.

a suprise early in the mornin was something i wasn't expecting,
cos it was a saturday and they are the types who don't like to cut short their snoring!

they were all there,my othala gang
but the leader,Mr.Othala was missing cos he was nursing a jaw hang!

b'day song was sung and the cake was cut,
deep down i was cursing that extra candle abut!

i couldn't cut the cake cos my hands were shivering,
excitement,shock and happiness ,Oh boy my legs were really trembling.

then followed the tradition of stifling face with cake,
i didn't complain cos i knew wht a food facial chocolate would make!

but all this came with a big big price,
later in the evening i had to scrub and vaccum the carpet to make it clean and nice!

i don't know how to thank you all for the wonderful b'day gift,
it will surely remain with me for long and not go adrift!

boy i suck at poetry, but othala gang a big thank u(its coming straight from my heart) ,one of the beshhtesstt suprises ever! this was the highlight of my day and it distinctly overshadowed the rest of my evening!

Seek!

Her eyes wanders around the place, the sea of shocking red is in stark contrast to the pale green of the lawn around ,she hears the familiar sound of knives and spoons clinking against plates,she sees people walking around with their meals in deep assiduousness, but these sights and sounds are like mute nothings. Her eyes continues to search, for that one single anticipated glimpse,she knows not what she is looking for but she subconsciously knows what her eyes seek.The light that she had hungered for once is now reduced to a subdued blur.

She asks herself "what is it I seek"? Love,intimacy,companionship,there was never a dearth of it. While her friends rolled in hay she walked around,a solitary speck in the sky. She pursued her own path, undeterred.
She asks herself "why is it i fear?" Confident,articulate,garrulous, she was like a chill-champagne,but when the moment arouse she fought for words,she felt her toungue clinch.

Hiding behind these questions she continues on her path.And then the moment befalls.! Walking tall with a crop of frizz ,this she was inconceivable to miss. The smile on her face erupts back wiping away the mazed look in her eyes.Her heart skips a beat,her legs shudders and a sense of fervor envelopes her.She knows it will last only for a short time but the magic of it all mesmerises her.
Silent parting!
She waits with anticipation for the moment to come again....

"you can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see,but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel"

sojourn in the paradise of palaces!

"the whole object of travel is not to set foot on a foreign land ,it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land."

Having spent the better part of my life in Karnataka, i feel mortified to say that i have never explored Mysore,so it did seem like a foreign land when we stepped out of the railway station and got a whiff of the City of Palaces. Now before u guys put attack on my tepidness i have to admit that i HAVE seen the mysore palace(with n without lights!) and the zoo and the Brindhavan gardens and the KRS dam a zillion times. These places were more like a stop over on our long journeys to Kerala and also the preferred place to go when relatives landed for a visit,we do ve a dearth of decent places to see in Bangalore,oh did someone say MG Road,Brigade Road,CMH Road and the plethora of malls that ve come up in every corner! Shucks!

June 23, it was a glorious morning when we landed there,the sky a white tent cut out with wisps of grey clouds. The air was fresh after the early morning showers and the trees a resplendent green. Where the nature's green unfolds!
Beautiful !, oh boy i kept reiterating that word every nanaosecond till my friends threatened me with dire consequences. *chup* !
After a sumptuous breakfast at adigae manae we boarded the bus to Chamundi Hills (20 bucks bus pass rocks i say!). Our travel around Mysore was the most economical till date, to start wit Buffalo(some ppl call her swetha!) and I boarded the train with just one ticket *bloop*,now this is interesting cos we were told by some screwball that the train tickets cost only 25 bucks ,so i very happily went to the Ticket counter with 50 bucks and told the guy two tickets to Mysore.Our pal heard it wrong and handed back 6 bucks and a ticket with 44 bucks stamped on it. Very very happy with the drop in prices (we assumed it was 22 per head) and thanking Lalooji we boarded the train. After reaching Mysore we get to know our wrong doing (Savi gave us a mouthful for our kantri budhi!).

The trip to Chamundi Hills was zzimbbly amazing. White clouds hovering the hill top, sea of green on either side, and a chill early morning breeze. After the darshan we boarded the bus to Devraj Urs road(supposedly a very hip-n-happening place). We got to see the real mysore just staring outside the window. Laidback people,nicely tarred roads, buildings that look like palaces in every third corner(even the hospitals are build in that fashion!), easy moving traffic, and all this admist greenery. It was 2PM by the time we covered the entire stretch of Urs road(up and down,on foot mind u!). Next Pit Stop :: Infy Campus. Oh boy,i rubbed my eyes in disbelief.! Are we still in India ? Not really the concret jungle i had expected. Manicured lawns, open wide roads, nicely maintained shrubs, glistening buildings , well stocked Recreational rooms (20 TT tables,insane or what!) and hoardes of ppl walking around with tags,it was sadistic to know that ppl actually worked on Saturdays. NRN hail thee..!
We started our trip abck to Bangalore at 6:30, with the correct number of tickets off course.! Chatting away to glory and munching away the madhur vadas we returned back to Bangalore and its choc-a-block traffic, fast paced life and the clogged drains (monsoons are hittin us hard this year!).

wht was tht again..err..on the bench i mean! *slap*

Droning lecturers and repetitious information, sitting through a Engineering lecture was a pain in the well..hmm..wrong place off course..! Even a serious attempt to concentrate in a subject as interesting as Microelectronics often resulted in my mind wandering off after the first nanosecond . A fun thing i used to do to kill time was write with my non-dominant hand in books,and to tell the truth i've got quite a lotta practice writing with my left hand in those 4 yrs.! If you happen to walk into a really exciting and thought provoking lecture like Chapter 5 of Microwave Communication you will find 10 per cent(those gugu geeky types) taking down notes, 50 per cent blissfully passed out and the rest 40 per cent doodling dutifully on benches and notebooks.!A sight to watch indeed.!

While writing this post i was reminded of my first few days in college and how i would walk around the classroom reading all the doodles on benches.Frustration,creativity,proclamation of love,they were all masterfully crafted on wood by seniors for the subsequent batches to read, and yeah every batch which passed out of a class left behind their mark. I'm sure somebody must be reading my left-hand scribbling right now. This timepass activity can take different forms like..

*personalized ones :: These are done by people who are very serious about the sayin "leave your mark". You don't ve to strain ur eyes to read it cos its there as a bold big carving "rahul sat here" . The not so egoistic ones scribble things like "viking-vikram" or "ravishing-raveena",colorful adjectives i say!Shucks! did somebody say whts in a name??

*romeo juliet ones :: ahhhaa.! this is done by ppl who believe in the sayin "don't let love interfere with crappy lectures"(well its not really a saying,i just made it up!) ,look closely(some ppl believe in maintaining anonymity) and you will spot small hearts with "chinnu loves chinna" or "rahul loves preeti and yes there will be an arrow cuttin throught all this which make reading it all the more difficult.


*aspirational ones :: Now every class will have dude's who aspire to get that magical 15 in internals or 35 in externals by just farting around,so before exams these screwballs take the time n effort to scribble the 150 page lesson on a 20 inch space.So you have all the important derivation,circuit diagrams and definitons neatly written down for further reference. I will be lying if i said i didnt indulge in this crime.!


*caricatures :: this is the part i liked.! academic deities depicted as constipated langoor(that's how most of the professors looked!).. boy some of the caricatures were just outta this world types! If lady luck is not by your side n the lecturer catches u drawing his caustic face u are done for ( i flunked in one my internals cos of this!)


*arbit art :: cars,beer bottles,dragons,nike(this was the most ubiquitous one,every third bench had it),adidas,jet planes,ninjas.. hmm.. knifes,nuts n bolts..*memory fading*, geometrical shapes,space ships etc etc etc..!

Some people found pleasure in this simple art form while some others found pleasure in bailing outta class.(i took pleasure in the latter,art has never been my forte!).

stride,stride,stride ....

Fatigue, hunger,thirst, and an agonizing headache to complete it all. She was physically drained , but mentally intoxicated when she stepped into her room. The fading sun,the sky hued to a braight orange shade, the chirping birds soaring high and the green leaves ruffling in the gentle breeze. She took it all in as she stared out the window. The cold water was like a soothing balm to her battered body. From a distance she could hear her mom calling ,but she kept staring out the window. She never reached home from work before 8PM.Tht's one thing she missed after joining a software company,seeing the setting sun.The sights from her window baffled her,she couldn't remember the last time she saw the evening sky,how beautiful it looks. The ten inch cubicle in which she was confined from 9-6 stole this luxury from her. The chirrups from high above sounded like music,how melodious it sounds. The gentle breeze dried up the beads of perspiration on her forehead,how unlaxing it felt. She felt alive and in a way child like. She took it all in cos she knew these moments don't come by very often. She felt alive after that long walk back home.

Trance !


When she mooted this idea to her friends they laughed it off, it was crazy they said! Undeterred she decided to take the plunge, the task was a herculean one , she knew that but the magnanimity of it did not discourage her. She was ready for it!
The company cab ferried her from Mysore Road to Banashankari and from there she started her long journey back home by foot. The afternoon sun was beating down hard which made the walk even more horrendous. Exhausted and tired after the first 6KM, she felt her body crumbling under her feet. Pheidippides!, she recollected how he had run 40 Km from Marathon to Athens to announce that Persians had been defeated in the Battle of Marathon. She drew inspiration from his great feat and continued. She had covered this very route for the past 8 months, but watching the sights from a speeding company cab was not as joyous as seeing it all ,taking it all in while walkin on the footpaths. She stopped by to appreciate the big huge trees lining the streets,she wondered why they hadn't fallen under the axe of BMP. She saw kids running back home from school holding each others hands. She saw street venors selling toothapuri mangoes and ice lollies. She saw small kids playing hop-scotch and hide-n-seek on the galli's. These simple sights baffled her, she couldn't remember the last time she saw them,memories of childhood resurfaced. Sitting in a closed environment from morning till evening had bogged her down. She remembered what Jimi Hendrix had once said "I was living in a room full of mirrors and all i could see was me,then i broke one of them and there it was,the WORLD for me to see".

She missed waking up and feeling the early morning sun on her face,she missed the feel of monsoon rains on her skin,she missed the sights and sounds of bustling markets ,she missed it all. With these thoughts she walked and walked and walked , before she knew it she had reached home. She covered the entire stretch from Banashankari to Koromangala by foot. Rejuvinated,thats how she felt!

(i know its a crazy thing to do,walking from one corner of bangalore to another corner,but you guys should try it! if not everyweek atleast once a month. there's lot more u see and hear when u walk then when u whizz past on a bike!)

postcard from the 80's

somebody once said "souvenirs are perishable,fortunately memories are not" , so true!
its amazing how little things from your childhood ,that's long forgotten and etched in some safe corner of ur brain can bring back a flood of memories and emotions.. i'm typing this while humming the ever popular song of yesteryears "mile sur mera tumhara".Wish i was in possession of a Time Machine, damn!

remember those pre-satellite TV days?Doordarshan with its rotating logo? colorful concentric circles wit a tin-tin-tinna tune dissevering amul, nirma washing powder, lifebuoy,hamara bajaj Ads? if you are saying Doordarshan wht, then u must ve spent the first 15 years of your life on a remote island off Hona-lulu.!
those images were dusted today afternoon during lunch at our FoodCourt, the characters that emerged were surreal yet life-like and eons ago they managed to capture our tender imagination and for me they still do.
*wiping that single tear from the corner of my eye*

Sensational Songs ::
the one song that lifts me up,"mile sur mera tumhara",National Integration at its best. highlighting the different linguistic communities, it features people from all walks of life singing in their native language..Oh boy, words evade me.! "when ur tune meets my tune it becomes our tune" , ok that wasn't a ripe translation. I don't remember much of the video but i do remember Prakash Padukone running with the National Games torch , the Calcutta Metro,Dr.Balamuralikrishnan singing by the beach and Kamal Hassan. The song fades with the final hymm of our National Anthem.Thanks to cable TV ,the song melted into oblivion.!
another song that captured our national pride was "bajesargam".. this song also had multi-linguial hymms but don't quiet remember the video or much of the song.!

TeleSerials ::
top spot would go to "malgudi days" ,do i hear u guys sing "tanana tana na" .Rural charm,ordinary and eccentric characters, small town ,village library and postoffice,normal people living a middle class life, Swami and his antics. India calling!
another equally captivating serial was "vikram aur beetal"..back then it was the most scariest thing after PT teachers,but if we were to watch the same thing now it would be one big hilarious viewing.
in the 90's we got our share of household drama in "shanti" and "swabhiman".. Good lord sometimes i wonder wht happened to that sari-clad ,hair tied up in a bun,bedecked in black jewellery and big-bindi Shanti.! phew.!
during vacations Doordarshan used to air a science program called "UGEC Science Program", i don't remeber much of it but i do remeber the "News for the hearing impaired" that was aired inbetween that show. Rings a bell??
come sundays and we would ve our dose of "ek aur anake" ,"mowgli", "potli baba ki", "ek do theen char" and "ramayana and mahabharat".. be it the jungle boy raised by wolves with the help of Babloo the bear and Bhagheera the panther or the colored carboard animation of a girl and her brother learning numbers by looking at jumping squirrels and birds or the old baba in ragged clothes or the valorousness of mythical characters with bow and arrow trotting away on chariots , they evoke some long cherished memories.!

Amazing Ad's ::
ok picture this, a quintessential indian family, father riding a two-wheeler and sari-clad mother sitting behind him sideways , the elder one sandwitched between the two and the younger one sittin in front wit his hair ruffling with the wind, get the Ad im talking about.? No ? ok one more shot.. a young man(proud of his two-wheeler) blows on the emblem and rubs it sparkling clean with a towel ,background musical score "bhulanda bharat ki bhulanda thasveer".. one of my favourite Ads - Bajaj Ad.! i even like the "nirma" one, with that cute little kid in a swirling white frock. also on that list is the "i'm a rasna girl" and the "utterly-butterly delicious Amul " one!

sigh! bygone wonderful days.
its all a memory now,tempered by time and life goes on with these memories......

are u carrying your Style Statement ??

"we are trendy we can't even escape ourselves" ~ Kurt Cobain
Disclaimer :: in this blog u'll find lotta interesting quotes,it has been plagiarised.Kurt Cobain is so darn good with quotes n i've used his without any inhibition. [:)]
*freeze*

in conversation with a friends sister, Miss Cool Chic (MCC) ,who just jumped from school and landed in the abodes of one the many Catholic colleges in Bengaluru.

Me :: "Hey,howz it going? Enjoyin the new environs?"
MCC (flicking the loose hair on her forehead) :: "Cool maan, i mean the place is awsoome maan,i mean..."
Me (horror-stricken at this incarnation) :: "Nice to hear u having a swell time. You seem to ve
undergone a make over and girl, whats with the accent??"

(i was greedily checking out this 16th something "girl", trendy clothes, voguish hairdo that would ve easily costed her 800 bucks and a american(or was it british!) accent to complement it all.! )

MCC (again flicking the lose hair on her forehead) :: "yeah man,i mean these tops are the in-thing now, i mean everybody sporting it ,i mean.! "

i stood gaping.."wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are" ..Oh wait i ve one more "The worst crime is faking it"

her excitement was palpable and teens these days ve sure grown out of high-rise jeans and stitched shirts. i thought back on my first few months in college,boy i was bowled over by the cool factor so much so that i would try all the tricks in the book just to fit in..! it was about creating a new identity rather than holding on to ur own. Moments of fame are truly short-lived i must say ,slowly i slipped into my normal self : T's+Track pants ,but Hey! it did feel good walking around without a mask.!

i would clock a miserable score in the cool-o-meter of these new age teens . " i'd rather be hated for whom i'm than be loved for who i'm not "
*i dont wait for weekends so i can check out the new pub down brigade road.
*i'm a self proclaimed riceaholic and these days u'd rather drop dead then say "where is my rice+sambar.!!"
*i dont own the latest gizmos in town,my 5 year old cell would ve slapped me tight if God-Lord resurrected it.
*i swear by my battered scooty to move from point A to B, and the torn seat doesn't stymie me down, really.
*i still believe in the comfort of my T's and Tracks but god dammit i work in a software company. my wardrobe has a deep aversion to anythin voguish.
*i love to cook but girls these days take great pride in extolling tht they find it difficult to boil even eggs.
*i don't speak polished yenglish..idiomatic expressions like "macha","da","maga" are uttered after every three pauses.! but its stylish when u replace those with "dude" ,"fuck","shit" (ok sometimes i succumb to the cool factor n use it, so dnt pounce!)

cool is definitely a splendid thing to be these blistering days of summer. 4 yrs of college n meeting some truly exceptional ppl i realised you need to be Cool where it really matters,on the inside. So who are the cool dude's anyway ?? Its hard to define but can be spotted. They walk nonchalantly down corridors during internals while the rest of us fret and sunder about that all important derivation and suprisingly they click top honours, they finish BE and then follow unconventional routes to become a chef or a journalist, when exam fever strikes u can spot them catching up on the latest best-seller or watching the latest block-buster , when the rest of the world goes ga-ga over capris they walk around in peasant skirts , they consider themselves bigger than brand like Levi's and Nike... they are the ones who just don't succumb to anything.! hopefully young ones these days will emulate these cool dude's and not the likes of Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan.! so,how cool are you?

"Rather be dead than be cool"..

sugar crystals on scurrying feet..

unexpected rains sure brings respite from the blazing heat, but along wit the rains ur house plays host to hordes of uninvited guests. Ants sure seem to know every nuke n corner in ur house and they have no qualms in comfortably planting there asses in those teeny-weeny holes without ur permission.! so i decided to get onto all fours n follow one pal as he made a dash to his haven with my biscuit crumb, off course i didn't do that cos i knew (yes intelligence prevailed.!) it would result in my head crashing against furniture n walls.!


ants are said to be the most intelligent n organized creatures,they are know to ve brains bigger than the collective brains of all beauty pagent participants,and they are organized cos hey! ve u ever heard of a teenage ant.! these small creatures often bump into other ants on their way, give high-fives and exchange pleasantries like "Hey Jim, oh sorry are u Job's twin??" and move on . there are times when u spot a lone ant aimlessley walkin around like he's just attended the funeral of 20,420 of his immediate family members who perished under a bourbourn cream crumb.
why am i writing about these primitive creatures anyway... bloop..! its a sunday afternoon and i ve nothing substantial to do..! cocokroaches here i come.!

the making of a good loser

i rubbed my eyes in disbelief, boy how did i manage to loose my wallet again.! if im counting right i ve scored 3 points in the oh-shucks-ive-lost-it-again department in one bloody month.I was shocked but undeterred , and as i started hurling things here n there in utter frenzy i thanked providence that i had never known the joys of Credit Cards.!
I swear by JuteCottage bags n wallets n the rate at which im losing them,im sure contributing to their booming business,shucks!

the first was a jhatang orange one that i lost at Chinnu's Video Centre.After hurling a string of abuses for the cheap quality DVD's he was renting out and also commenting on the outrageous daily rental,i went back home.. half an hour later i realise my folly.! god dammit.! i run back to the store in my PJ's to be confronted by the grinning shop owner. It was pay-back time and our pal had that go-screw-urself look on his face. Lost 200 bucks plus an old one rupee note( it gave me company for 5 years :( !) n my debit card. Thanks to our wonderful salary(my relatives think im on dole!) i didn't ve to worry about my perpetrator sweeping the crumbs from my measly account!

the second was a jhatang red one that i lost in our company cab. Now this story is interesting cos i got back my wallet, poorer by 900 bucks + 2 ,30 bucks food coupouns. My driver , the good samaritan that he is returned back the wallet but it was swiped twice at some petrol pump.! ok moi not getting into a blame game here but his story of how he stumbled upon my wallet was not tangible,not one bit of it! on the brighter side since it was swiped at a petrol pump i get those all valuable points that ICICI offers,ah freebies .!

that jhatang red one is wht i lost day before yday, again in the cab. My conclusion, my bag is jinxed. 100 bucks+ 0ne 20 buck food coupon. sigh! i realized my imbecility yday morning and when i told it to my mom she was furious,so much so i was blinded red.!(she's an absolute angel but there are times when she looses it!)

Me :: "Mummy i cant find my wallet, did u take it?"
Mom :: "grrr..! u lost it again, have u lost your mind.!"
Sis :: "no no she lost her wallet, i dnt think she carries her mind wit her to loose it!"

losing can be painful,and the pain really pricks when u realize that some goon is enjoyin a bitti biryani wit ur money.

directile dysfunction...

"why did God put Man on earth ??"
"cos a vibrator cannot mow a lawn".. ha ha ha.!(ok that was crass.!)
the real reason :: he knew that if Man was given the destination(Earth) he would screw it all up by reaching Pluto.. Men never ask for directions.!! so God decided to personally place Man on mother earth.! (ok now tht wasn't funny either.!) .. hmm ,funny is definitely not my middle name.!
its true that Guys have an intelligence(when it comes to roads n directions!) as big as an electron and if you happen to bump into a guy who is driving around in circles ,confusion writ all over his face, he's definitely lost his way n yes he will not stop by to ask for directions!

i thought back on numerous occassions i guided one screwball or the other(much to their repulsion) and saved them from becoming another missing poster in the newspaper and on tree barks..

few days back we were to attend a friends wedding reception in JP Nagar...we vroomed off to the venue on bikes n somewhere past diary circle we lost our way... the horror of all the food being devoured by the other guests was freaking me out but my friend Mr.Disoriented Dude(MDD) failed to sympathise.. jezzz,guys can be a real pain in the wrong place,it can be an even bigger hassle if u are wit guys who walks around wit an ego as small as Jupiter.! shucks .! if-i-ask-a-passerby-for-the-exact-location-i'll-be-committing-the-biggest-sin-recordable seems to be every guys motto.!

MDD :: "i think we need to take a right near tht Bannergatta signal"

Me :: "errr..! why don't we stop n ask that auto driver,im sure he'll be able to guide us"

MDD :: "i don't think he would know,im sure the route i'm thinking off is the right one"

Me :: "ahem...! we went past that Pan-Walla shop thrice already.!"

MDD (one more word from ur mouth and i'll smidge u down look):: "grrr..!"

we reached the venue well past the stipulated time.. few dried up pieces of gobi manchurian,ice-cream that met a watery-grave and sweepers n cleaners instead of ostentatious guests.! sigh!

last week two colleagues of mine decided to flex their limbs with a few badminton smashes at Chinnaswamy Stadium..putting on the navigators suite i had to guide Mr.Lost Lad(MLL) and his friend to the venue ,but alas it turned out to be one horrendous experience..!

Mr.Lost Lad (MLL) :: "hey im near corporation,how do we proceed??"

Ms.Navigator (MN) :: "take a left near that aeroplane model n keep going down the road till u hit Gate No.1"

*after 10 mins*

MLL :: "hey im at gate No.7,how do i get to gate No.1??"

MN :: " i'm coming out,just hold on..!" *puff,pant,puff* (damn need to build stamina) ,"ok im outside gate No.7,come out n u can spot me.!"

MLL :: "hold on we'll park our bikes n be there in a jiffy.!"
*after wht seemed like eternity*

MLL :: "hey where are u.??,we outside Gate No.7"

MN :: "ok do something,dnt turn left,turn turn right just walk straight u'll spot Gate No.1.. this place is right next to the Anil Kumble circle.."

*realizations finally dawns*

MLL :: "errr.. is it chinnaswamy stadium or kanteerva stadium ??"

MN (thinking of the choicest expletives):: "$#%^ , %^##, ^$#@"

how many roads must a man drive down before he admits he is lost,
why when he gets married is he able to find his pair of socks!
the answer my friends i cannot comprehend, the answer i cannot comprehend!

sooo many lost MEN ,but soo little ASPIRIN (ok peoples accept it,tht line was funny in'it.!)